Are you really a size 12/14/16/18?
This is a subject that really winds me up.
How can I go into one shop and fit comfortably into a pair of size 12 jeans and yet I go into the shop next door and I can bearly negotiate the waistband over my thighs?
What, did I put on half a stone walking from one shop to the next?
Did some fat genie manage to slap a couple of layers of blubber around my waistline when I wasn’t looking?
I cannot fathom why High Street shops haven’t cottoned on to this before now: when a woman comes into your store and finds her usual size only fits a waif-like teen with no bust and minimal curves SHE WILL HATE YOUR STORE FOREVER!
It is a fact of life that women seem to be governed by their clothes size.
Celebrities seem to covet that holy grail of the American size zero and if some minor star is being interviewed in a magazine about their “amazing weight loss” the first thing you’re told is how they went from “a hefty size 14, down to a super slim 10″.
A hefty size 14? That is going to make everyone who is a 14 or above feel like the size of a cow.
And if you’re naturally a UK size 8 or below you’re labelled ‘annorexic’, ‘unwell’ or (this was once levelled at a perfectly healthy but very slim woman I did a feature on in my former life as a features editor) ‘a f***ing disgrace’.
Hmm, I’ve gone off the boil on a bit of a rant there.
So, imagine you’re in a shop looking for a pair of jeans and you’re usually a size 14.
You try their size 14s on and they’re so tight you’re having trouble doing them up. Then – oh no – you can’t actually get them off again.
After struggling, breaking a nail, going all red in the face and then catching your reflection in the mirror do you go back out into the store and get a size 16?
Do you buffalo – you stalk out of that store swearing you’ll never shop there again because there is “no bloody way I’m a size 16!”
Yes, I KNOW it’s ridiculous and you should just buy the size that fits and what does it matter if it’s a 6 or a 16? I know there will be men reading this and thinking ‘what the?’.
But it’s Woman Nature. We know it’s ridiculous but psychologically we buy into the fact that we must fit a certain size and we WILL NOT venture out the other side of it.
All of which is my way of telling you that my clothes are a little looser. And I have had to start wearing a belt with my work trousers. And it makes me want to jump up and down a lot.
It has made me SO tempted to run out and buy buy buy something new. But I just know that I’ll get all disheartened and probably be rude to someone in the fitting rooms and then get upset and come home and eat a chocolate digestive. Or seven.
So instead, I emptied the contents of my wardrobe onto my bed and sorted it out into 3 sections:
1. Stuff I can wear now
2. Stuff I can wear in the very near future
3. Stuff that when I can wear it I will post of picture of me on here in just my underwear.
NOTE: Those trousers in the picture were my pulling trousers. In my pre-married days, those trousers did me proud. I loved them so much I had two pairs! I wore them on my hen night (not as pulling trousers, obviously!) and now they just sit there in my wardrobe as a grim reminder of, well, of how hot I used to be!
I want to wear those trousers again!
Tara
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42 Responses to “Are you really a size 12/14/16/18?”
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Yea verily! (And good for you Tara!)
I have serious troubles just finding pants that fit. Clothiers don’t even seem to make sure pants of the same size fit the same. I’d love to just buy 5 pairs of the same jeans sometimes.
I’ve been reminded several times while visiting your posts here of an older song called Super Model Citizen by the Echoing Green. Hope y’all don’t mind if I share. (Scroll past if you don’t want to read lyrics.)
Picture in the fashion magazine says I’m not complete
It’s so discreet…I smell deceit
They need someone to make ‘perfect’ but I can see -
That somebody’s not me
You buy into what they’re selling and then
They kick you down until you start all over again
They don’t care where you’re coming from
Or where you’ve been
As long as you’re a supermodel citizen
Empty faces on your screen
(Supermodel citizen)
Tearing down your self esteem
(Supermodel citizen)
Is there a difference between what is me
And what I see on the TV?
Someone showing me the ‘me’ I’m supposed to be…
It’s not a physical reality
Well don’t think, don’t worry, don’t talk just
Hurry grab the phone and get your order in by 10:00
They’ll never let up ’til your fed up
And you set up your lifetime account
With supermodel citizen
If they used more than their eyes
They’d be able to see
There’s a heavenly beauty
Inside of me
Avlor’s last blog post..Sharing is the best part
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:29 pm
“There’s a heavenly beauty, Inside of me” – I need to chant that over and over in my head Avlor!
And I’ve done the buy multiple pairs of trousers thing too (though not 5 cause obviously that would be madness! 4 maybe).
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Oh, I COULD NOT AGREE MORE! This frustrates me so much. I wish someone could just come up with some kind of standard, and make every manufacturer follow it.
Pants are the worst, of course. And don’t get me started on jeans. You’d think that when they measure the waist in inches you wouldn’t have to try on 3 pairs. Someone doesn’t know how to use measuring tape.
As for your question- no, I never go up one size if the piece of clothing in my size doesn’t fit. I know it’s completely stupid and it doesn’t matter, but I can’t get myself to do it. I wish I was better than that, I really do…
And good for you!! Keep it up:)
Adrenalynn’s last blog post..I guess that Darwin guy was on to something
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:36 pm
Hmm, a thought just struck me: I wonder if it’s men who come up with these sizing conventions?
Anyway, I LOVE that you refuse to buy clothes the next size up even if they fit perfectly because it means I’m not on my own and I’m not mad! x
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Uh, what are pulling trousers? Are those the ones you wear out to pull guys off their barstools? Or are they pulling at the waistband? Is this a British term?
My ex’s mother used to be proud of being a “perfect size 12.” Someone five foot one and a twelve didn’t seem to be something to crow about to me then, but whatever. Since I was about six inches taller than she and a size 10 or 12 at that time, I paid it little mind. I, myself, used to be proud of being a junior sample size 9, back in the day, and a bra sample size, to boot.
On Sunday, I was happy to be into a pair of size fourteen wool trousers I had bought several months ago from a line that tends to run small. Let’s not get started on shoe size, either. You know how babies are rated in whatever percentile for height and weight? Shoe size percentile is my bane, even if Jackie O did wear the same as me.
I’m making a short point long, here. Manufacturers and designers develop their own fit, sometimes using real people, but only in one size or two at the most in what they consider the mid-range. Back in my sportswear buyer’s day, this was a 9 or a 7, in American junior sizes. Then the sizes are mathematically decreased and increased to get the range. Sample garments are rendered and sent for approval. I can remember getting sample pants from Asia, where we hired factories to produce the store’s private label, that were far too short for American legs. They couldn’t believe we were that tall, and just decided to modify the specs until they “looked right.”
Because of the way dozens breakdown into ranges, you generally would have a line sized from 4-12, or from 6-14. Then the breakdown was purchased in a 2-2-3-3-2 pattern (2 of size 4, 2 of size 6, 3 of size 8 and so on) because most of us are supposedly “average.” S-M-L was usually purchased 1-3-2. Because most of us are “average, trending large.”
The problem occurred in these ways: first of all, with the changing aesthetic -originating in couture – to the boyish, anorexic prototype, manufacturers downsized, offering 2′s, 0′s, etc. Some of them even sneakily assigned lower numbers to the specs they already had. Calvin Klein notoriously did this. I, a 9, would usually purchase a 10. All of a sudden, I’m in his 8. Ralph Lauren is another one with generosity in his fit. Try his stuff for a boost if you’re judging yourself by the numbers. I, a 12 in my forties, wore his 8 in jeans. I still have those, just to prove it to myself, and as part of a goal. So, the mid-range, formerly an 8 or so, now drops to a six or even a four.
Seriously, WTF! Either we all starve ourselves, or they downsize their specs. Lots of them aren’t dummies, but others don’t care. They know no one wants to feel fat, and we’ve adapted so that we can wear their clothes for so many years, we’ve enabled them. The issue is merely given lip service once in a while in a Letter to the Editor in Vogue or W. After all, you use less fabric in the smaller range – cost, cost, cost to produce.
Try a Small tank top on from a store like Hot Topic, where I shopped with my daughter recently. My left tit wouldn’t fit in it. Jeans began being sold by waistband in sizes that Scarlett O’Hara with corset couldn’t fit in. When Guess jeans were first made, the French guy who owned it showed us how to step on the waistband and pull up on it to stretch and get it to fit our (not-so) fat selves. Um, why should we have to do that again?
Manufacturers and designers, since they are even more bombarded with the skinny aesthetic than we are, come to think of it as the norm. That’s all they see. It’s like if you hang out with liberal Democrats all the time, an evangelical Christian will seem like an alien. Folks of normal size look fat to these people. And they are in charge of what we get in the stores. Open a J.Crew catalog and put it side by side with pictures from Darfur. Very similar. Magazines like W, and the industry’s seedy undertow of cutthroat modeling-related ventures, contribute to the issue.
So, it’s a landscape painted by the media and lovingly maintained by clothing manufacturers, who knock off designers by cutting corners, sometimes on fit AND construction techniques, in order to mass produce. Disheartening and sometimes far too much energy required to beat them at their game, except by voting with our clothing dollars.
Unsold merchandise? Returned to the manufacturers by the stores in a Draconian policy accepted as an industry norm. It’s numbers, as in any business. Someone has to be buying these smaller sizes, and in sufficient quantity to reward the practice. Maybe in Asia, where people are smaller and more plentiful.
Betsy Wuebker’s last blog post..WHAT ARE YOU MADE OF?
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:39 pm
Betsy, that is just a brilliant response. It’s like a post in itself and all time I’m reading through I’m all ‘yes’, ‘yes’, ‘yes’!
My husband absolutely does not believe I’m reading a weight loss blog!
Anyway, pulling trousers are trousers for pulling men basically. I know, I know, but it was a long long time ago and I need to hold on to these memories!
Also, “try a Small tank top on from a store like Hot Topic, where I shopped with my daughter recently. My left tit wouldn’t fit in it” – made me go ‘bwaaahahaha’ and it’s only Dave Fowler who does that on here normally.
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GreenJello Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 10:11 am
Re: Smaller sizes (0, 2)
I’m actually glad they have these sizes. They fit my pre-teen girls perfectly. The girls’ sizes are too short in the legs and body (I have tall, skinny girls), so moving over to junior size 0 (instead of a girls 14 or 16) is a most excellent option.
I still remember my mom complaining when I was about 11, that there were no pants out there that fit me. I wore floods, because there wasn’t any other option.
GreenJello’s last blog post..Migraines and Headaches
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I too have clothes to remind me I weighed 100 pounds and looked hot and when I show my teeny tiny jeans from my 20s my kids call me a liar, “no way were you ever that small mum” If I thought shoving the cheeky monkeys back in would make me thin again I would
It is clearly their fault as I was thin before I had them!
melanie’s last blog post..All I can say is
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:41 pm
Never a truer (sp?) word spoken Melanie.
It is my children’s fault for making me eat loads of sweet things to combat the stress too, so maybe I ought to charge them for the wasted wardrobe full of clothes I have.
“No more pocket money kids. You’ll be paying for making mummy fat for at least the next 10 years.”
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Ahhhh I hate this. Sometimes I take 3 sizes into the chaging room as I have no idea which one to go for. It is so depressing. And I am one of those over a size 12 who has curves, but I still have a shape and do not want to just wear sacks. Tsk.
Jo Beaufoix’s last blog post..A Lesson in the Senses
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:42 pm
No no no Jo. If you are a size 12 you are not allowed boobage or Jessica Rabbit hips. Did you not get the memo?
Shame on you for being all woman.
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barbie girl Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 7:36 pm
Well I’m b*ggered then, I’ve just lost 1.5 stone and I’m in size 12 jeans but still have 38DD boobs. Aaargh!
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We were having this conversation (sort of) at the school gate the other day. About how you’re not really a 12 but you’re not really a 14 and if only they did half sizes. And then we had the brainwave – make trousers like they do for kids with adjustable elastics at the waistline. Having a fat day – let them out. Having a good day – reel them in. I know it’s not quite the same as stores making different size sizes that are meant to be the same, but with adjustable trousers, you’ve got a good margin for error. It’s a brainwave. Genius. But I can’t sew. Or design. And am not fashionable. So I don’t really see my future as a clothes designer. But if anyone would like the idea and then pay me royalties, i’ll be happy with it.
Homeofficemum’s last blog post..6 days in. How’s your year shaping up?
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:45 pm
What. A. Brilliant. Idea!
I wonder if Gap would go for it? My favourite favourite jeans from are from there but if they had that “fat day elastic” in there, I’d buy up 5 pairs in one go.
Sorry Avlor (comment above) I lied, I totally would be multiple items in one go. Even if that way madness lies. You just can’t arue with jeans with children’s style adjustable elastic in there!
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Avlor Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 7:05 pm
Adjustable elastic. hmm. That would elimate the need for a belt. Bonus.
Let’s see those celebs use elastic to make their pants go from 14ish to size 0.
Avlor’s last blog post..Sharing is the best part
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 5:09 am
Sure, I can just see Nicole Richie hitting the red carpet in a pair of Gucci trousers complete with kiddie side elastic, hitching them in a bit because he played around with her food at the fancy meal beforehand!
Me? I don’t really much care. I just wish they’d standardize it so I don’t have to try on 3 pairs to see which one really does fit!
GreenJello’s last blog post..Painting
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:46 pm
You’re clearly a much more level-headed shopper than the rest of the hyterical women here GreenJello!
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Oh. My. Goodness. Now you’ve got me started. I was in Montreal over Christmas and I swear I will NEVER SHOP THERE AGAIN! I was trying on sizes three above my normal size, and I couldn’t get them up over my thighs. I was so freakin’ depressed! It wasn’t just one store. It was half a dozen stores! Give me a break! I get a 1 size difference, but needing to go up 4 sizes? I will NEVER SHOP IN MONTREAL AGAIN!
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 13th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
Ha ha! I don’t mean to laugh at your misfortune Panther, but CASE IN POINT!
I just imagine you harrumphing out the stores too!
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I loved reading Besty’s comment on how clothes sizes are made. I’ve heard that the more expensive the item, the more “generous” the store is with their sizes. Never having enough cash for an expensive item–I wouldn’t know.
However, I did go clothing shopping with two very thin pre-teen girls who were very proud of their size 0 and XXS clothes. Really, those girls could have still been wearing outfits from the little girl’s department, but they fit the tiny clothes in Abercrombie & Fitch and American Eagle.
It’s sad to know that size zero fits an 11 year old girl, yet there are teens and college girls deluded enough to wish (and starve) themselves into that size. I hold up a size 4 and just laugh. Who fits into that? A tiny, shriveled grandma?
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 5:10 am
There was that whole thing about Victoria Beckham having a waist so small she could fit into a pair of 8-year-old child’s jeans!
And it was being lauded up like it was some kind of achievement.
Err hello, she’s not a child anymore she’s a grown woman. Well sort of
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To me, the amazing thing is that most women in the USA are a size 14, at least that’s what I’ve read.
I’m so tired of trying on pants that don’t fit. In addition to the size issue, being 5’10″, I also have a height issue.
I’m also one of those women who have pants in their closet of various sizes. Periodically, I sort them out, but usually end up putting most of them back again, in hopes that I will be able to wear them again.
And like you Tara, I will………………………:)
LisaNewton’s last blog post..Can you relax at UCLA?
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 5:12 am
You and me both with the wardrobe sorting Lisa!
Every now and again I’ll get them out and try them on in the vain hope that I can finally finally fit in at least one of them.
But I will do it. I will I will I will
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nil zed Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 8:23 am
An American size 14 is not the same as UK. In US, I was size 18, but here, I’ a 22, verging on 24.
My biggest problem is with the scaling up. When I was younger & skinnier (110 LBS), I was very flat on top, but with hips. Dresses were problematic b/c to go over my hips, they were very loose on top. Now that I’m twice the woman I was (yes, 220 lbs), the manufacturer’s think that all my weight gain must have gone to creating a huge, matronly bosom. Nope, I’m still the same pear shape, bigger at the bottom. Tops of dresses fit so poorly I just can’t wear dresses at all. But a blouse & skirt is not always the right ‘look’, you know?
I’ve been told that in the U.S., catalog companies who sold clothing through the mail did have regulated sizing. But if they had shops too, the rule didn’t apply. So there were few companies that had to follow the regulation and it’s become history.
I agree on the shoe problem as well. In U.S. sizes, I have a collection ranging from 6.5 to 9. Most of which aren’t quite wide enough, but very few stores sell shoes with the width I need. That aren’t selling orthopedic shoes.
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 15th, 2009 at 4:56 am
Hey Nil Zed, welcome
I’ve ranted about shoes in the past too! It seems us girls have the same problems no matter which continent we are in!
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Oy, I know well the Size Dance. I hate it! I usually pull the size I want to fit into (a 10, but I’m pretty sure it won’t fit), the size I think will fit — fingers crossed (a 12) and the size I know will be big and hopefully roomy (a 14).
This helps me get a gauge on the sizing and usually eliminates having to walk in and out of the dressing room more than twice.
Frequently I try to pants on, hex the store under my breath and leave vowing never to buy pants again.
cardiogirl’s last blog post..I was a wild rebel cat even back then
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“Frequently I try to pants on, hex the store under my breath and leave vowing never to buy pants again” – I like you style Cardiogirl.
I also love your name! Welcome and I hope you’re going to be giving over some tips in future comments? No pressure then!
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On my last shopping trip I came home with nothing but frustration.
I can be anything between a 12-16 dependent on where I shop. The reason for my frustration is that now I am either a 13 or 15 which is NON EXISTENT.
Aaaaaaargh
PS – Tara I had some of those Gap trousers too. I wore mine till they had holes in them. Best trousers I ever had.
Laura’s last blog post..Dear Supernanny
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 9:40 am
You need a pair of Avlor’s trousers with children’s adjustable waist. I tell you, they could be big business!
That’s so funny you had the same Gap trousers. Did you pull in them too!
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You hit the nail on the head. I’m 6’1 and not the perfect size I once felt very comfortable I could pull in..lol Seems like over here in America if you reach a certain size you’re expected to be short and LOVE bold prints, BRIGHT, BOLD, prints. Now shove a 40G bust on that and you’d be hard pressed to find good clothes, that fit right anywhere.
I have to admit some of the stores over here are getting a bit better (Old Navy, Banana Republic, & Ann Taylor Loft), but it can make what would normally be a fun afternoon out with girls a nightmare.
Oooooh and don’t get me started on shoes over here in the US aparently feet only grow to a size 11 (UK 8). When you get to a size 12 (UK9) you can only find cheap shoes that are usually to narrow.
Good Rant Lass, Good Rant I feel better already..lol ;O)
Kirst’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday ~ Holy Leaf Batman!
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 14th, 2009 at 2:37 pm
Good rant indeed Kirst! I see this is something you’ve been bottling up.
I know what you mean about the bold prints. Yikes, what is that all about: not a fan then, I pressume!
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Tara – why do you think I took up knitting? Am going to knit myself an outfit that actually fits and doesn’t have to have the size label cut off so I don’t feel the shame burning through my tights!
Only downside is that am not sure knitwear from head to toe is on the runway for spring 2009?
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I would pay oh I don’t know how much money to see you wearing that outfit Mom/Mum.
Oh my goodness, that has put such an image in my head!
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How’s this for terrible? I’m American but my husband is Irish and so we go over there every so often and I have this internal battle with myself over buying things there because not only is what would be a 8 in the US supposed to be a 12 over there, but since I am rather tall and they seem to cut for a much more petite person, I have to go up to a 14 at least. So, I will usually just wait and get clothes in Germany where my mom lives because the sizes are something absurd like 40 or 38 and for all I know that’s tiny.
(this is a moot point because the way the exchange rate is I can’t afford to buy European clothes anymore)
I also declined to sell some designer jeans at rummage sales where I’d know anyone because I didn’t want anyone to know I wore a 31 post partum.
I tell you as soon as my children get past the age where they lift up my skirts in public and try to hide in them, I am wearing nothing but flowy calf length skirts and v neck tees for the rest of my life.
Tracy’s last blog post..This is just to say I have eaten the haggis that was in the can
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 15th, 2009 at 5:02 am
“I also declined to sell some designer jeans at rummage sales where I’d know anyone because I didn’t want anyone to know I wore a 31 post partum” – I wonder how many women read that and nodded their head in recognition!
You sound totally sane to me and just the kind of gal we need over here to sort us all out.
And look at you with 5 BOYS and still managing to stay this side of sane!
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Just wanted to drop by, since you dropped by my blog. I think I’ve commented before on From Dawn till Rusk (in the good ol’ days), and I’ve been to Sticky Fingers too – but maybe I’ve done more reading than commenting.
I’ve considered signing up here, too, as I’m seriously needing/wanting to get fitter and healthier. I’ve been swimming 3 times a week since last summer (when I say 3, I mean usually 3, sometimes 2, always at least 1), which I feel good about, although it hasn’t made a huge difference to my weight or shape. But I know I must be fitter, as I used to swim a slow 15 – 20 lengths, whereas now I whizz along, do 20 every time, and am wondering if I should start aiming for 25.
How do I get rid of the tummy, though? Shouldn’t swimming help with that?
On the sizing issue, it was great when I moved from the UK to the US, and dropped overnight from a 14 to a 10 with no effort at all. Won’t be so good going the other way…
Iota’s last blog post..Presidential words
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 15th, 2009 at 5:19 am
Iota, you don’t need to sign up to anything, just hand us over a pint of blood and your first born . . . .
No no no. You are welcome anytime. Just dip in now and again if you prefer or come on over and offer support or get support – whatever’s good for you.
If you go looking on some past posts you might even find some pictures of Dave Fowler in his underwear but not sure if that will encourage you more or put you off.
Anyway, people here are trying all manner of things to get in shape, from walking and jogging to Wiiing and Weight Watchers.
Hope you find something that helps. x
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Gahhh! Stupid women’s clothes shops and their sizing. Do they have ANY idea how much of my time and temper they waste?
I’ve got 45 minutes in my lunch hour, and what I REALLY want to do is walk in and out of changing rooms, dress and undress and find all sorts of clothes that nowhere near fit, even though they all carry the same number.
Here’s a thought: dump the sizing and use centimetres. As far as I know THEY don’t change.
It’s the same for bras – there are only two values to think about: band length and cup volume, yet they’ve managed to MAJORLY cock that one up too.
I won’t go into the whole “Have they noticed that women are not shaped like men with beer-bellies” bit. All skinny thighs and huge waists, crazy.
Nurgh.
Penelope Else’s last blog post..Procrastination Case Study – The Writer
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Tara Cain Reply:
January 15th, 2009 at 5:21 am
Don’t even get me started on bras Penelope. I’ve already had a good old rant about that in a previous post!
Clearly us girls all have the same gripes.
I know what you mean about the shopping in your lunchhour thing. I’ve been in to a changing room and come out totally depressed, then gone back to work and shouted at everyone because I couldn’t get a top to fit!
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Why can our sizes not be just like men? We could size clothing as we truly are, i.e. 34, 35, 36, 41 inches rather than an ambiguous size 10, 12, 16, 18. What do these sizes really mean? And who determines them when different stores can have varying sizes all reading 12 on the label? This is ridiculous and causes undue stress on women. (Also, seeing as women are the leading consumer of all things including clothes, I would think the manufacturers and designers would want a system that results in a positive shopping experience-so that we keep coming back.) Otherwise, we will simply make do with what is already in our closets or wardrobes rather than go shopping for the newest styles.
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