Guest Blog to Fat Post: Danny Pudge
by David Wright on April 2, 2009
in Blog To Fat
Today’s special guest post is from Life Coach and Un-Fitness Guru Danny Pudge.
Danny, who was a shift manager at a fast food joint before starting a blog and becoming a life coach in 2008, has successfully gained 140 pounds in just six months! Now he wants to help you gain weight too!
Please welcome Danny for his first guest post at Blog to Fat.
How much do you want to change?
Sure, you SAY you want to be fat, but do you really WANT to be fat?
How MUCH do you want it?
Are you doing the things you need to do to get fat or are you simply hoping to someday be fat? Well, I have news for you.
Hope is for the hopeless.
- Are you tired of eating pancakes and pizza all day and not gaining an ounce?
- Do you have friends who seemingly eat nothing and gain tons of weight?
- Can you still see your ribs?
- Are you unable to hear Sir Mix A Lot’s Baby Got Back without wishing you had a bit more of a motor in the back of your Honda?
Don’t worry; I used to be JUST LIKE YOU.
Now look at me!
For the first time since last year, YOU can benefit from MY experience with a LIMITED TIME offer to get my newest program MASS EATING CONTROL 2.0.
Because this program is so super special and successful, I can only accept the first 10,000 people who respond to this!!
The first version of MASS EATING CONTROL sold out in 22.7 seconds. So don’t be left out.
YOU TOO CAN BE A FAT LIFE COACH UN-FITNESS GURU!
What MASS EATING CONTROL 2.0 teaches you:
- The secret food found in everybody’s cupboard which packs 2,500 calories per serving!
- The best methods to walk without burning any calories!
- The SEVEN things you do every day which ACCIDENTALLY BURN CALORIES! Only MASS EATING CONTROL 2.0 will tell you what these SEVEN THINGS are and how to counter them with the right food combinations.
- The SECRETS that the food industry doesn’t want you to know! Did you know that cereal companies have been making their cereals HEALTHIER? I’ll show you the cereals to avoid and RIGHT ONES TO EAT TO GET THE MOST BANG FOR YOUR GUT!
- Access to the MASS EATING CONTROL 2.0 FORUM. Our MEMBERS ONLY forum is full of people just like you – future fat asses and those who have already succeeded and WANT TO HELP YOU MAKE THEM MAKE MONEY!
- How to write motivational web content and WHAT SECRET WORDS you MUST CAPITALIZE, in order to SELL YOUR PRODUCT!
- A really nifty box which DOUBLES AS A COOKIE JAR complete with EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO GET FAT AND SELL STUFF TODAY!
How much would you expect to pay for a program like this?
Would you believe it’s only $2,000?!
You’ll make $2,000 back and gain 20 pounds in the first five minutes alone!
Remember, there will likely be a mad stampede the minute that this program goes live, so you MUST ACT QUICKLY!
Remember this program is NOT FOR EVERYBODY.
This program is NOT FOR:
- People who want to be “in shape”
- People who have an aversion to making $4,000 in the first two weeks of selling their LIFE COACHING AND UN-FITNESS GURU services and programs to others.
- People who don’t have money. Really, just go away already. Why are you even on the internet?
- Losers who like to make money by working for the man and being in shape and stuff.
Still not sure if this is right for you?
Read these testimonials from people who were once JUST LIKE YOU!
Honest John Thomas of www.honestjohnthomas.com - “I used to be in the real estate market, making tons of money in an industry which was rife with dishonesty and scam artists, and that’s just in my office alone. When the industry bottomed out due to other people’s greed, I had to find a new way to make quick and easy money. That’s when I found Danny Pudge’s Mass Eating Control 2.0! Two weeks later, I gained 85 pounds and am rolling in money! Literally, I grease myself up in syrup every night and roll around in hundred dollar bills. Thanks, Danny!”
So if you WANT to be as fat as me, email me with your name, credit card number, social security number and date of birth.
I hope you’re hungry because we’re going to be drinking a lot of milkshakes!
If you have any fitness questions for me, feel free to post them in the comments and I will answer them in a post on Friday.
Follow DannyPudge on Twitter @dannypudge for more the most ROCKIN TWEETS EVER!
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The Blog To Fat Wednesday Weigh In, April 1, 2009
by admin on April 1, 2009
in Blog To Fat
Get Fat not fit
Losing weight and getting fit is hard work. It’s boring, it’s depressing and it takes over your life.
How many times have you eaten a slice of cake only to berate yourself because you haven’t exercised enough to warrant eating it?
Why feel guilty for enjoying food? Why feel guilty for enjoying your life? Guilt is for people who don’t enjoy their lives.
I Say NO MORE GUILT.
I intend to SEIZE THE DAY… and some candy and donuts while I’m at it.
I’m fed up of only being able to sniff at a chocolate bar or limit myself to one biscuit – per year.
I’m fed up with being asked ‘how’s the diet going?’ ‘have you lost any weight yet?’
blah blah blah.
There is a global trend towards being overweight now. From celebrities like Kirstie Alley to normal everyday billionaire talk show hosts like Oprah, more and more people are expanding and do you know what?
I don’t want to be left out.
I want to be in with the in crowd not the thin crowd! So I’m going to just go ahead and eat. Bigger IS better! And get this, we have a head start on the new trend because we’re already fat! Our new goal is to lead the herd and be as BIG AS WE CAN!
So starting this week, we here at Blog To Fit Fat are taking our site in a new direction. We have a great week lined up for you with posts on Thursday, Friday and Monday and Tuesday of next week before our next Wednesday Weigh-In.
So be sure to come back tomorrow!
I’d like to thank our newest sponsor, M&M Diet (not to be confused with M&M’s). You won’t believe how hard it was to get sponsors before, what with all the weight loss sites out there competing for advertising dollars.
Fortunately, with this new format, we’ve got several lined up and can finally cash in!
Meet Sarah, who before the M&M Diet, weighed only 130 pounds. Now, just FOUR DAYS LATER, she is a hefty 375 pounds!
Now, for the weekly Wednesday Weigh-In
Tara Cain
I’ve gorged all week. This is my new plan. I have been deliriously happy throwing takeaways, chocolate cake, biscuits and crisps down my neck. I was even happier when I decided that I would stop all exercise to see how it made me feel. And I have to say, I’ve never felt happier.
What the hell was I doing with all that giving up refined sugar for Lent nonsense? Really, life’s too bloody short.
The stats:
- Starting weight Wed. Nov.19: 168 lbs.
- Goal weight: 140 lbs.
- Weight last week: 162 lbs.
- Weight today: 172lbs
- Amount gained this week: 10lb
David Wright
Now, THIS is more like it!
McDonald’s welcomed me back with open arms this week as I fell, no, JUMPED off the diet bandwagon!
I had a Number 10, a Number 4 and two Cokes to wash it down. And that was just breakfast. God, it felt good! My body welcomed the chemicals it had so sorely missed. I’m pretty sure my fat cells did a little dance of joy, glad to be fed once again.
Unfortunately, I got a late start on this new Un-diet, and ONLY gained 2 pounds. I know I can do better next week!
No, I WILL DO BETTER next week.
The stats: David Wright
- Starting weight Wed. Nov.19: 350 lbs.
- Goal weight: 250 lbs.
- Weight last week: 328 lbs.
- Weight today: 330 lbs.
- Amount gained this week: 2 lbs.
- Total lost since Nov. 19: 22 pounds